sigh.......

I'm alone...

I'm never actually alone at all. I've always got the kids in my house and under my feet, but I'm so painfully alone that I cry. I cry for the life I was promised, I cry for the life I had, and I cry for whats left.

It's not fair. To be given the moon and the stars and then have them ripped out of your hands.....not fair.

When will I be better? When will I be happy with what I have left? Why can't I smile and mean it?

Please, please, please, I need to be able to smile with my eyes again. I need to have someone who will hold my hand and look at me with love. I need to not be so fucking alone.............

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