What now..........

In a moment of frustration and desperation, I sent off an email to Mike Holmes of the TV show begging for rescue from my home. Apparently not only did I offend and anger my wonderful friend and her husband, but I damaged my husband as well. Even though the email itself was benign in that I never once blamed my contractor for the problem, just the fact that I sought outside help was the issue.

I spent last night tossing and turning, wondering why I've been so constantly slammed. Have I offended someone higher up and they're paying me back? Have I done something so horribly wrong in a past life that I'm being punished in this one? Why is it that I can't ever do anything right other than birth my babies? Apparently I can't even raise them correctly or they wouldn't talk back to me, draw on walls or break the new TV set.

How much longer must I be on suicide watch for others and myself? How bad is this life that I'm not the only one in it thinking death is a better way?

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